LIFE EXPRESS!!!

life's like a train. a train constantly running around, all over places, with people exiting and entering at various terminals and junctions; people whom you forget, people whom you remember for some time and people who leave an imprint, an impression on your mind. i once read somewhere :
                  "it's the same earth the same sky but perceptions differ...
                         it's the same road, the same curve but journeys differ...."

this particular quote now stays on my Facebook page permanently. it's so true! all of us are on a perpetual odyssey, the journey of life, taking you to places, landscapes, people.... the only fact that differs us is probably our train. may be we are on different tracks. may be we boarded different trains. some opt for flights too, some ships and some prefer road journeys. :) to each his own. everybody has a struggle to conquer, a dream to achieve, a responsibility to bear, a hobby to indulge in and people to live with, please some and annoy some! life's is such a roller coaster ride! the tracks, your train is running on, can turn any time! to the left, may be right or who knows a u-turn too! it's all about time. it's all about capabilities. and it's all about your spirits! what looked like a happy, carefree, stress-free childhood, transformed to become a hectic, wandering, philandering teenage! and it went on to become a confused, a mysterious youth! now when i stand here at this crossroad of my life, at this junction where i have to change my train since this one goes till here only, i am absolutely unaware which next to board! career! this junction is career! every person has so many dimensions to his/her personality. each dimension can go on to build a perfect base. but then, you cannot be a master of all. you need to decide. now is the time. i am a simple, a routine bubbly girl, only 22 and i feel a little stressed now! school, college, everything is over now! those fun days, now have a counterpart in struggling days! success and struggle do go hand in hand after all. success comes to those who are all for it, up with their arms and strength! 

my tragedy is no peculiar. as ordinary as a dog on the street, i too, am struggling, coping with my wants, my needs and my desires, me deeds and my dreams. i am not disillusioned, just a little translucent. may be this thin sheet of film lies because i fear. i fear about the consequences. about the reactions! response from those who expect something else from me. do i really need to please all? do i really need to kill my dreams and board some trains just because people around me want me to be on that train and enjoy the new journey? well, who knows whether i'll enjoy that journey or not? who knows whether i'll be wanting to continue that journey or not! no one. other than me of course! it's me. it's time now. it's now or never! i see myself going somewhere. i vision myself, happy and gay there, my world full of smiles, smiles that emanate from the satisfaction, the contentment i would be having within..... yes.. i see it..... i only need to toil a little .... and my dreams sure don't come cheap! they require attention, hard work, the lust in my eyes for them and of course determination. am i up for it?? :) i am all for it! :) come what may, i'll be there some day..... some day very soon........ insha allah!

One post dedicated to my Dream :)

While ruffling through the paper hurriedly one day, I chanced upon this piece of text. And the moment I read these lines, the words- naam, namak aur nishan, sat fixedly in my mind. I don’t remember what news was doing circles then but as a random guess I would put the Indian Army crisis.  One of my friends recently went to attend the Army SSB in Allahabad and came back with a very inspiring quote on his sleeve- join Indian army as mortals and become immortal… something like that. On one hand we have people in our country, dying to become a part of this force; on the other hand we have various scams, controversies and loopholes coming to the fore now and earlier. The immortalizing force does have mortals ultimately, do we stand right in blaming some and defending some? Living through the defence circles since childhood, I know that defence news travel fast but only internally. No civilian has any right over it. We, from defence talk like mongers among ourselves, but for civilians we stand united. Nobody knows the inside stories but the blame game goes on and on. Media presents whatever tit-bits it gathers from its sources and the rank and file of the forces reacts in a limited manner. The biggest manipulation is done by the politicians who try to gather mileage for their parties by highlighting these issues and the govt functioning at that time…… anyway, I  don’t really want to go into that topic so let’s just talk about what I actually intend to share…

I never understood when my spirits and longing for the uniform raised so high that today I run on any and every call from the force. Maybe the lure of the uniform and those salutes inspire me, but then it is the discipline, the code of conduct that truly makes it my calling. I know clearing through SSB makes the toughest part but then who achieves his/her dreams without utter struggle?

Those words- naam, namak, nishan... they really stay with me. Maybe I sound cynical and utopian in my words but they really transpire from my thoughts. People close to me know how much I am into this. Trials, rejections, friends’ selections… these things depress and inspire me at the same time. When I see my friends making it, I feel …I too can. When I don’t get recommended I feel maybe next time ….. When I go and stay there for those beautiful 5 days, I live my life to the fullest! 5 days with complete strangers at the onset but too good and fast ones towards the end, those meals in the mess, the single cot with blankets and mosquito nets, morning tea, wake-up radio alarm, the bai jee-s, those lines in the bathroom and hot-water taps, the mysterious GTOs, pysch tests, interviews, GDs….and what not! Those 5 days at the board change you every time you go there, loading you up with some more wisdom, some more introspective improvements, some more skills and a mighty set of new bustling friends who would stick with you forever. Maybe those friends don’t make up for your school buddies but then, they have their own place in the hearts, their own settlements or should I call the billets :P :D

Who knows where the future lies but our dream, our vision is worth some struggle, some trials, some rejections, some tears, some smiles, some time ad surely some words…. ;)

My set of SSB friends are worth some space too… so let me start with my first batch :-

MYSORE (26^th dec, 2011): Mythraye, Sheetal, Divya, Aakanksha, Pooja, Pallabi, Suganya

                                                I miss you guys… you were the first set of people who transformed from being complete strangers, all coming from different states, to becoming my great friends! <3 p="">

BHOPAL (17^th july, 2012): Kanika, Rachana, Jagdeep, Sunishtha, Madhu, Swati

                                                This being my second conference time, I was a little skeptical in the starting but meeting you all was the best thing that could have happened to me! I truly love you all and long to see you soon <3 apne="" bade="" completely="" ek="" hn="" nbsp="" p="" rock="" se="" together="" toh="" we="">

 I would not mention the VARANASI batch coz that is marked as my screened-out one L still the journey was worth its while J with Jammy, Jaya and Aparna, I saw some thrifty times in Benares ;)

The little travels to different parts of India has left me equipped with some beautiful memories, be it living and travelling with cousins, or hanging out with friends, or having the ugly war of words with people on roads, or going live on air…. Everything is a beautiful memory, framed and kept beautifully safe in the locker of my heart…. I hope such sojourns continue in the coming trips to Noida and Dehradun but then I also hope that these be my last ones too…….. that end on recommendation! J  

I have earned the most important part of my life in SSB so after all these trips, it was worth one post J

Fingers crossed for coming ones!